Thursday, December 4, 2008

Just one of those things.....

I am kind of having one of those weeks where I feel unhappy fat. Like, life would just be great if I could wear a size 16, or run 3 miles or whatever. I don’t think this all the time, but I go through my bouts.

In February I will have maintained my weight loss for a year. Give or take the normal 3-5 pound fluctuation throughout the month. I am proud of myself. That is a major accomplishment, and to be honest I’ve changed a lot of things about my life style, and I should be proud of them.
Eating a healthy breakfast everyday.-I make conscious choices about what I eat for breakfast, how much protein it has, and how many calories (As in enough). I also aim for a whole grain, healthy fat and protein…and always a fruit. Sometimes a veggie, but mostly a fruit.
Eating 5-7 servings of fruit and veggies a day. This is one of the biggest changes I have made and stuck with. I don’t always make it to 7, and some days I don’t make it to 5, but two years ago, there would be days, DAYS, that I would go without eating fresh produce. I can’t fathom that now.
Eating “real” food. I still enjoy the convenience of certain packaged foods. Some of them aren’t real, like bbq sauce for example,…but I’ve really changed in that aspect, I try to make things from scratch as often as possible.
Not eating at night. It was the months of December-May of 2007 that I really gained the weight I’ve lost. My husband and I had just gotten married, I was incredibly happy, and we lived next door to a convenience store. Scott worked nights, and would often stop by the 24 hour store to grab something for a 2am snack. He would come home and I would wake up and eat. I would also eat at 10pm, when I was bored and lonely with out him. Now I only eat at night if I am hungry, but I do usually allow my self one evening treat, a small dessert, a beer, or a glass of wine.
Being “food prepared.” I pack the food I am going to need and want to consume at work the night before. I always pack my lunch (sometimes my breakfast) and 2 snacks. Always..that way I don’t get 3pm blood sugar crash and have only the candy jar to keep me company. I also try to be food prepared for travel and unknown situations with fruit, string cheese and protein bars. I generally don’t like protein bars as meal replacements, but I’ve found that in airports, they are often the best choice. Protein bar…or personal pan pizza?
Exercise. I get some form of exercise every single day. Even if it is only a walk with the dog. I walk the dog every day. For at least a mile and half. Most days I do that, plus a 25 minute cardio or 25 minute toning workout in the employee workout room. Before that though, I went to the gym 5 days a week for a year. July to July. Before work…at 5:20am.

I didn’t post this to pat my self on the back, I posted it to make my self feel better. To bring to the forefront of my mind that I am a healthy, happy person, and that I have made huge and fantastic changes in my life that have truly benefitted me.
And all of those things are good, and it is ok, that even though I have lost 25 pounds I’ve only gone down 1 pants size. That I shouldn’t be jealous of the fact that a woman on the biggest loser weighs the same as me, and can wear a size 14. I posted it to remind myself that those numbers don’t matter. The only thing that matters is that I am the best I can be for me.


Janie said...

It might sound strange but I love that you feel like this sometimes. You have been my inspiration to get off my ass and do something good for myself, and I really have to fight sometimes not to fall into the "I'll always be fat and that defines who I am" mindset. You should be incredibly proud of all you have accomplished! You are an amazing woman!

Allison said...

Thanks so much. I'm glad that I could inspire you...your comment made me smile!